I have a confession-- I have been untrue to myself. The last four months I was so caught up in making a relationship happen that I neglected myself. I didn't listen to the Holy Spirit when he spoke (ever so gently, because He is a gentleman). The result of not listening has caused some pain.
I was deceived. Yet, there were warning signs that I didn't pay attention to. I feel like I have been here before, this place called hurt by a failed attempt at a relationship. Maybe I had to repeat it because I didn't learn the lesson many years ago.
If I sit still too long I begin to go over all the words he spoke, the actions he took and I get angry and sad, because the bottom line is, he lied to me. Does it make sense to say the lie hurts more than the deception? Or are they one in the same?
A man of integrity, I need to find out what that looks like. because maybe if I can see what he looks like, I'll have hope. So my heart won't get hardened and my speech won't be bitter.
This is not a diary of a mad black women, but I must admit thoughts of causing pain have crossed my mind. Then I remember God is my justifier.
Defined by thefreedictionary.com as
n. 1. One who justifies; one who vindicates, supports, defends, or absolves.
- Strype.
That he might be just, and the justifier of him which believeth in Jesus.
- Rom. iii. 26.
Tru
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
Posts
2 comments:
We've all been there before. Trying to make someone more than who they are meant to be, never works.
Embrace the moment....
Now that you know better, you do better!!! Keep your head held high and keep on shining!!! Love, Tai
Post a Comment